Life

Perfection DOES exist, but you have to stop searching for it.

Have you ever heard of the term “pursuit of happiness?” There’s irony in that. When you actively seek happiness, it may be right in front of you, but you’re too busy looking for your written, textbook definition of the word that you miss it completely.

Maybe you BELIEVE happiness is something like a three story mansion with rose-red doors, acres of open land for your sunflower garden and a German shepherd to run free or some shit like that. 

If you’re too busy looking for that exact scenario, you’ll miss out on what will truly make you happy in life because you don’t open your eyes to the opportunity presented in front of you to even contemplate whether it’s what you’ve needed all along. Just like that, a perfect opportunity can come and pass.

How ironic that all you want is to find happiness and you miss out on it because you’re too busy searching for something “perfect.”

Most people seek this superficial idea of happiness. It’s normal; I get it. But happiness is more than just the outcome; it’s the journey. It takes years to save up for your visualized dream house, car, family, or whatever it may be. Make sure that your way of achieving those things is something that makes you happy too. If you feel like having a specific car one day is going to make you happy, the job you have to get you there should be one you appreciate everyday. Or say you have a dream body in mind: find a style of training, eating, and living that makes you happy.

The issue with the “pursuit of happiness” is that we see happiness as perfection: a very specific (and oftentimes superficial) result. And if it’s slightly different than your expectations, it’s just not good enough. Not perfect.

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When you seek perfection constantly, you fuck up your chances of ever being perfect.

I believe perfect is possible. I don’t know that it’s possible infinitely because in life, shit goes wrong and that’s okay. But I believe absolutely that it’s possible for awhile and even when there’s a little bump in the road you can obtain that perfection/happiness again.

Remember, too, that your idea of perfect may change and you can strive for an even better version of perfect if you choose to do so.

For example, say you have a vision in your head of the perfect body, maybe it be a size 5 pair of jeans with nice abs coming through for summer. And you spend the time enjoying the process of getting there and realize, “Oh shit! I’ve achieved this!” And you enjoy the journey & how you feel about yourself, but now you want something different. Your idea has perfect has changed. It doesn’t mean you don’t feel perfect already, it just means you thrive off of doing better. So now you realize you want to build some muscle and take on new challenges at the gym. That’s great- that’s perfect!

But this can only happen when you’re not actively seeking a perfect life, a perfect body, a perfect romance, a perfect situation. It just happens when you enjoy the process of being better by treating yourself well.

You may stumble upon something one day- be at the right place at the right time- and realize that, although you didn’t realize it then, you stumbled upon the perfect situation that lead you to happiness.

Just remember you’re going to have to let go of your fears, harsh expectations, and judgments to find what you’re looking for, whether it be in yourself, someone else, or in any situation.

Let it flow to you. Stop stressing about what SHOULD be and just simply let it be if you cannot change it. There are things out of our control in life and for a reason. Give situations times. Do your best all of the time. Trust the process and trust that a perfect life is achievable, but through finding joy in the things you’re doing to better yourself.

Remember this and then one day you’ll realize everything is perfect for now (and it only gets better from there).



Do you believe that “perfect” exists? Have you ever felt a situation in your life that was your idea of perfect? Let’s hear about it <3

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Lexes O'Hara

Lexes O'Hara is a personal trainer and nutrition coach. Her work philosophy is to teach her clients to, "train, eat, and live like a bad ass." Certifications include NASM CPT and FNS.